Last Non-Due Date
Mar. 14th, 2015 08:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
squishymeisterToday is the last day of week 39. Still no baby. I know it's totally normal to take this long, and even much longer! But I sort of thought I'd have the baby by now... my mom had all of her babies by at least 2 weeks early. Oh well, I guess it just goes to show that a parent's experience doesn't really have a whole lot to do with what happens to us.
The discomfort is mounting. I am being really cautious about how I sit and lay, because I want to encourage optimal fetal positioning- but it means that I rarely actually feel comfortable. My 2 defaults are laying on my left side and napping, or bouncing on my blue birthing ball.
I think the baby is getting lower. It feels like there is a bowling ball sitting in my pelvis. It's especially difficult to transition between sitting and standing/walking. Once I'm walking for about a minute I feel fine, but initially it's quite uncomfortable! A weird 'ailment' that has been gradually getting worse is sleep lines. I'm not sure what they're actually called... you know when you fall asleep and the surface you sleep on leaves marks? My skin has become incredibly vulnerable to that- not helped by the fact that I'm supposed to stay on my left side ALL night- so there is no sharing of surface space. The lines really hurt! I'm up to pee every couple of hours, and whenever I go back to bed, I can feel all the markings wherever I have clothes, seams, or sheet wrinkles- they burn and itch and hurt. I've tried sleeping without PJs the last few nights to limit seams, but it just makes me really sweaty, and the sheets still leave just as many marks, so i can't win. I also have been experiencing a lot of increased fluids in the pants. To the point where I actually thought yesterday that I may have sprung a small leak.
I called the delivery suite to ask for advice on it. They had me come in to check- largely because I admitted to them that the baby has been moving a LOT less in the past couple of weeks. So I headed to St Georges at about 9:15am and went to the 4th floor Fetal Day Assessment Unit. There they hooked me up to a heart monitor for the baby's heartbeat. I sat in that chair for about a half hour pushing a button every time I felt the baby move. The baby moved plenty. The girl right next to me was clearly having contractions. She did not seem happy about it! Freaked me out somewhat, to be honest...
Then I went to another waiting room for an hour or so until my scan. A male midwife did my scan, with a technician coming in halfway to do some "teaching" (it is a teaching hospital after all). He confirmed that the head is down, there is at least one pocket of fluid, and everything looks healthy with the placenta. I asked for an estimate on the size of the baby, which they grudgingly gave me, with many caveats about how it's not accurate. First the guy said almost 9 pounds at 8 lbs 14 oz. Then he re-adjusted that to 8 lbs 5 oz, and then finally adjusted once more to 7 lbs 10 oz. So my guess is that the baby will be somewhere in the 8 pound range if they show up soon. If it takes another week or 2 to be born, then who knows how big they'll be? They assured me that big babies are nothing to worry about- it's the little ones that concern them.
Then I went back to the original (super hot) waiting room. I then had to do an internal exam. She looked at my cervix and had me cough to see if anything was leaking. She said no. Then she did a swab- just in case of infection. She checked the heart rate of the baby a couple more times, and then sent me back to the waiting room. I finally got my notes back and dismissed at about 1:30. She said everything looks perfectly fine, but to not hesitate to call back if I'm at all worried.
Everyone who saw me was super nice. The waiting times, as always, were horrible- but I figured I had nothing better to be doing.
So now I'm just waiting waiting waiting. I've had some period-like cramping. It actually was fairly painful last night as I went to bed. But nothing has started- no show, no contractions. I feel like I'm going to be pregnant FOREVER. I can't actually imagine this baby deciding to come out! I really don't want to go late, and I really don't want to be induced. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it happens this weekend (today is Saturday).
It's weird- because I really want labour to start- but I'm still terrified of it. I couldn't even handle the stupid little swab stick yesterday without it really hurting. I have no chance of getting through this! I can't sleep for more than about 2 hours at a time. I don't really have a lot of energy for *doing* stuff- but just sitting around on the blue ball is really dull. I've been putting off making a fruit salad all week. I'm sure my fruit is now less than at its best... I'm just so bored and so anxious all at once! I just want to get this part over with and move on to the next stage- even though I know it's going to be super hard.
Apparently 50% of women naturally go into labour within 6 days of their due date... so I'm hoping that that means that I've got a really good chance of having this baby by Wed.
It's a little funny- I actually can't call or text anybody without their heart skipping a beat because they think I'm giving them news about the baby being born. I kind of feel like I'm disappointing everyone for making them wait for so long. But trust me- the waiting is MUCH harder on me!
David is the only one who doesn't seem to share in the arrival anxiety. Don't misunderstand me- he's really excited. But he keeps going on about how much work he has to do, and how it isn't a convenient time for the baby to be born. In fact, he keeps having late nights "just in case"- which is really not helping me out at all. I'm on my own all day here, and seriously bored, and there are a lot of chores that I need help with- that he then can't help me with because he gets home too late. I keep telling him this- but I don't think he gets it. He just cares about his job FAR more than I care about mine. Ultimately I know that I come before his job... but if he can manage his job as a very close second, he sure does try his best.
It probably doesn't help that because of all of this discomfort, boredom, anticipation, and anxiety- I've become quite grouchy to be around. I'm irritated with everything and everyone. I just want this baby to get OUT. And I'm jealous of all of the people in the world who enjoy luxuries like standing up, bending over, and being able to lounge back on a sofa. And David gets the brunt of my grouchiness. Oh! And he keeps asking me if I think he will do a good job at the labour. He's worried because he's never done it before and has no way of practicing. Logically, I know that this is sweet- because he cares and wants to do a good job. But my gut reaction is "who the fuck cares about how hard this will be for you?!" because if you want to talk about being worried about being able to do something- while his role is important- it's not NEARLY as hard as what I'm going to have to do. So I really don't feel like I should be comforting him and providing him with support for having to support me. It's all highly amusing if you think about it. I'm sure when the grumpiness has left I'll look at it all quite differently and probably be ashamed of writing such things on my blog :P At least he doesn't read this- I've been trying to get him to read my LJ for years, he's not interested (he says I tell him all this stuff anyways! lol, he's probably right...)
Anyways- tomorrow is mother's day AND my due date. My first mother's day. I don't think David will have gotten anything for me... and I honestly feel like the baby probably won't have been born yet. But I'm really really really hoping to be wrong, and to be holding my baby by tomorrow night. I couldn't imagine a better mother's day gift than to have my baby finally!
The discomfort is mounting. I am being really cautious about how I sit and lay, because I want to encourage optimal fetal positioning- but it means that I rarely actually feel comfortable. My 2 defaults are laying on my left side and napping, or bouncing on my blue birthing ball.
I think the baby is getting lower. It feels like there is a bowling ball sitting in my pelvis. It's especially difficult to transition between sitting and standing/walking. Once I'm walking for about a minute I feel fine, but initially it's quite uncomfortable! A weird 'ailment' that has been gradually getting worse is sleep lines. I'm not sure what they're actually called... you know when you fall asleep and the surface you sleep on leaves marks? My skin has become incredibly vulnerable to that- not helped by the fact that I'm supposed to stay on my left side ALL night- so there is no sharing of surface space. The lines really hurt! I'm up to pee every couple of hours, and whenever I go back to bed, I can feel all the markings wherever I have clothes, seams, or sheet wrinkles- they burn and itch and hurt. I've tried sleeping without PJs the last few nights to limit seams, but it just makes me really sweaty, and the sheets still leave just as many marks, so i can't win. I also have been experiencing a lot of increased fluids in the pants. To the point where I actually thought yesterday that I may have sprung a small leak.
I called the delivery suite to ask for advice on it. They had me come in to check- largely because I admitted to them that the baby has been moving a LOT less in the past couple of weeks. So I headed to St Georges at about 9:15am and went to the 4th floor Fetal Day Assessment Unit. There they hooked me up to a heart monitor for the baby's heartbeat. I sat in that chair for about a half hour pushing a button every time I felt the baby move. The baby moved plenty. The girl right next to me was clearly having contractions. She did not seem happy about it! Freaked me out somewhat, to be honest...
Then I went to another waiting room for an hour or so until my scan. A male midwife did my scan, with a technician coming in halfway to do some "teaching" (it is a teaching hospital after all). He confirmed that the head is down, there is at least one pocket of fluid, and everything looks healthy with the placenta. I asked for an estimate on the size of the baby, which they grudgingly gave me, with many caveats about how it's not accurate. First the guy said almost 9 pounds at 8 lbs 14 oz. Then he re-adjusted that to 8 lbs 5 oz, and then finally adjusted once more to 7 lbs 10 oz. So my guess is that the baby will be somewhere in the 8 pound range if they show up soon. If it takes another week or 2 to be born, then who knows how big they'll be? They assured me that big babies are nothing to worry about- it's the little ones that concern them.
Then I went back to the original (super hot) waiting room. I then had to do an internal exam. She looked at my cervix and had me cough to see if anything was leaking. She said no. Then she did a swab- just in case of infection. She checked the heart rate of the baby a couple more times, and then sent me back to the waiting room. I finally got my notes back and dismissed at about 1:30. She said everything looks perfectly fine, but to not hesitate to call back if I'm at all worried.
Everyone who saw me was super nice. The waiting times, as always, were horrible- but I figured I had nothing better to be doing.
So now I'm just waiting waiting waiting. I've had some period-like cramping. It actually was fairly painful last night as I went to bed. But nothing has started- no show, no contractions. I feel like I'm going to be pregnant FOREVER. I can't actually imagine this baby deciding to come out! I really don't want to go late, and I really don't want to be induced. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it happens this weekend (today is Saturday).
It's weird- because I really want labour to start- but I'm still terrified of it. I couldn't even handle the stupid little swab stick yesterday without it really hurting. I have no chance of getting through this! I can't sleep for more than about 2 hours at a time. I don't really have a lot of energy for *doing* stuff- but just sitting around on the blue ball is really dull. I've been putting off making a fruit salad all week. I'm sure my fruit is now less than at its best... I'm just so bored and so anxious all at once! I just want to get this part over with and move on to the next stage- even though I know it's going to be super hard.
Apparently 50% of women naturally go into labour within 6 days of their due date... so I'm hoping that that means that I've got a really good chance of having this baby by Wed.
It's a little funny- I actually can't call or text anybody without their heart skipping a beat because they think I'm giving them news about the baby being born. I kind of feel like I'm disappointing everyone for making them wait for so long. But trust me- the waiting is MUCH harder on me!
David is the only one who doesn't seem to share in the arrival anxiety. Don't misunderstand me- he's really excited. But he keeps going on about how much work he has to do, and how it isn't a convenient time for the baby to be born. In fact, he keeps having late nights "just in case"- which is really not helping me out at all. I'm on my own all day here, and seriously bored, and there are a lot of chores that I need help with- that he then can't help me with because he gets home too late. I keep telling him this- but I don't think he gets it. He just cares about his job FAR more than I care about mine. Ultimately I know that I come before his job... but if he can manage his job as a very close second, he sure does try his best.
It probably doesn't help that because of all of this discomfort, boredom, anticipation, and anxiety- I've become quite grouchy to be around. I'm irritated with everything and everyone. I just want this baby to get OUT. And I'm jealous of all of the people in the world who enjoy luxuries like standing up, bending over, and being able to lounge back on a sofa. And David gets the brunt of my grouchiness. Oh! And he keeps asking me if I think he will do a good job at the labour. He's worried because he's never done it before and has no way of practicing. Logically, I know that this is sweet- because he cares and wants to do a good job. But my gut reaction is "who the fuck cares about how hard this will be for you?!" because if you want to talk about being worried about being able to do something- while his role is important- it's not NEARLY as hard as what I'm going to have to do. So I really don't feel like I should be comforting him and providing him with support for having to support me. It's all highly amusing if you think about it. I'm sure when the grumpiness has left I'll look at it all quite differently and probably be ashamed of writing such things on my blog :P At least he doesn't read this- I've been trying to get him to read my LJ for years, he's not interested (he says I tell him all this stuff anyways! lol, he's probably right...)
Anyways- tomorrow is mother's day AND my due date. My first mother's day. I don't think David will have gotten anything for me... and I honestly feel like the baby probably won't have been born yet. But I'm really really really hoping to be wrong, and to be holding my baby by tomorrow night. I couldn't imagine a better mother's day gift than to have my baby finally!
